emotions are a hell of a drug.bittersweet suckers.


The last couple of days I felt exactly like this.....about pretty much everything. I am not a moody person and I am not over the top emotional or sensitive....that's why it's kind of a big deal for me to realise that emotions actually influence my life a lot.


So....I've been dealing with this one situation for some time now, it's been heavy on my mind the whole time, but I knew that I will figure it out by the time I am ready....at least I thought it would be easy as that.

Then this weekend I was overwhelmed by everything.....I couldn't sleep, I couldn't concentrate or focus, I didn't care about anything or anyone, I felt.....empty, like a zombie, emotions taking me over. lost. I just had to find a way out.


I believe that everything happens for a reason. The bank holiday weekend got me to the point where I had to make a decision. Get it over with. Move on. I think that's a good thing.

I won't complain about the whole situation cause I pretty much fucked it up myself in the first place, but I can't bring myself to regret the decisions that brought me here. I am what I am. 



"I believe that everything happens for a reason.

People change so that you can learn to let go,

things go wrong so that you appreciate them when their right,

you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust noone but yourself,

and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

— Marilyn Monroe — 



Happy Easter. 

Never restrain the ways of your brain


Two girls on the train

watching the rain

playing a game. 

It goes by the name

'Never restrain

the ways of your brain'




Would you give up walking if you were able to fly instead?


Would you give up your eye sight or your sense of smell if you had to choose?


You have sex with one of the guys in this cabin or all of us die.Take your pick. (tough one )


What happens behind closed doors in Iran and China?

(In situations where people are repressed, the logical and usual consequence is rebellion.....and when you are not allowed to speak your mind freely, we can only imagine what a hell of a good time they have behind closed doors....yea right...we heard of those iranian home parties over here in Germany )


Why is it so hard to let the stupid guys go and why do you realise how much you like the nice one only when he's acting stupid? 


Is it possible to be in love with a dead person ? 


Hair-girl,leg-girl or booty-girl?


Is the food at Cha-Cha really fresh made ? We doubt it.


What are you willing to sacrifice to be true to youself?

"Someone comes into your life and half of you says you're nowhere near ready.

The other half says make him yours forever. I'm working on the forever part."

Say yes to everything.shirk nothing.Don't try to lie to yourself.





from "Wandering" , Hermann Hesse.


I wish all of you would understand Hesse in German language, his words are beautiful in so many ways.

"I like nice tits. I always have, how about you? - I like having nice tits."


That conversation between two girls in a movie I recently saw made me smile and chuckle to myself, because I thought about this: 


A friend of mine decided to get a boob job some weeks ago.She came by to chill with me the other day and asked me if I would mind to make a picture of my breasts for her, that she can show to her doctor.

I was like: for real? I mean....for real real? 

And she was like: I want them exactly to look like yours. They're perfect.


moment of silence for my ego please


So...she is going to have her breasts build after mine next month.

I'm excited about how my breasts will look with white skin.

I really would like to

have a conversation that doesn't sound like one that I've already had.

ich gruesse alle die ich kenne